Stereophile Goes Live!

by kelvin wetherell on February 22, 2025February 22, 2025

Hi Friends. Hope you’re all well and warm. At long last, Stereophile is done!!! Please have a listen to the audio below. Also on this page are the credits and story that unfolded while making the record and book. Buy links are below the player. Hope ya dig…

Purchase your copy via PayPal or eTransfer me at kdub@kelvinwetherell.com
It’s $20 for your digital download of the record and physical copy of the book
Canadian residents buying in person (at shows, etc.) please add $2.60 for tax. Total $22.60.
Online purchases are $1.75 to ship anywhere in Canada. Total w/tax and shipping $24.60.
Global shipping fees to be determined according to distance and packaging requirements
Once you’ve placed your order, please email us, along with your address, at kdub@kelvinwetherell.com and we’ll send you your copy of the book. A download link to the record will be sent to your email address.

If you live in Toronto, I might be able to hand deliver the book and give you a hug. It depends on where you live, or if you like hugs.

Thanks so much for your support!

Credits
Kelvin Wetherell – Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Les Paul, Bass, Piano, Organ, Drums, Percussion, String/Vocal Arrangements
Howard Ayee – Bass on Grip The Raven and Dark Horse
Kaleb Hikele – Piano on Kinder Things

Produced, Recorded and Mixed by Kelvin Wetherell
Acoustic Guitars recorded by Kaleb Hikele at The Townhouse
Mastered by Howard Ayee

All Songs Written, Composed and Arranged by Kelvin Wetherell Copyright 2025

The Stereophile Story
On an unseasonably cold and grey day at the end of April, 2022, I pulled round the last corner of an east end townhouse complex, checking each address and looking for the mailbox with the music stickers plastered all over it. After successful location, with acoustic guitar in hand, I knocked. Greeted by friend/studio owner (and fabulous singer/songwriter!) Kaleb Hikele, we navigated the barking of his dear doggo, Bear, and headed down to the basement to get to work. The idea was to record five of my songs with just my acoustic. I didn’t know at the time what the heck I was going to do with them. There was certainly no idea that they’d become part of an eight song, full length record and book. Over two days we succeeded in tracking five songs. I was down with most of what I played, then, in the true fashion of (usually unneeded) songster angst, I thought everything was shite. I needed a break from what I’d tracked.

Enter the studio upgrades. I’d just been turned on to the world of plug ins (digital instruments, recording hardware, etc.). I’d been recording at home for years. My beater of a laptop, eight years old at the time, therefore prehistoric in terms of technology, couldn’t handle the new oomph I was throwing at it. I’d recently reconnected with my old mate, Howard Ayee, who’d produced on of my records back in 2009. It was great to reconnect with him. He’s responsible for my new plug-in-fanboy-geek-out status. He was forever dangling the many new carrots that make modern recording truly awesome. I bought everything he sent me. I also bought a new laptop, which, after six months of agony trying to figure out why it wasn’t recording properly, made me so irate that I shelved the recording for months and spent the summer barefoot and busking at Jimmie Simpson Park here in Toronto. I returned the craptop and swapped it out for a new one. I got it set up and was off again…

I spent 2023 recording in bits, whenever energy or will permitted. Some of my peeps reading this are already aware of my chronic struggles. I’ve been living the effects of a botched hip surgery and was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in early 2023. At the end of that summer, I tore the medial meniscus in my knee and could hardly walk. My personal stars were not aligned and it felt like the universe was giving me the boots over and over. Still, we persist. I kept going, working my day gig and being a present, single Dad and solo householder. I kept up with my live playing and preparation, always wanting to keep my pickin’ and singin’ chops in shape, or “match fit”, as Jimmy Page calls it. 2023 was a great year for gigs. I played a bunch of out of town stuff and made some great friends. I was not much concerned that the progress of the record was not swiftly moving. In November, I decided to start creating the book that would accompany the record.

The written part of Stereophile, affectionately known as Booky, is a collection of lyrics and images that my daughter, Ava, and I created. The first drafts were created in a free, Word-light type program. My old friend, Alexis Campbell, recommended moving the creation of the book over to InDesign. I did so. She also let me use her Adobe suite, without which I couldn’t have made the book. I then spent many days wanting to fire my laptop through the sliding glass doors that lead out to our back garden. Anyone who’s used Adobe in the past can attest to how frustrating their proprietary, weird-ass way of doing things can be. Still, we persist. No laptops were harmed in the making of the book or record. Bit by bit, I was making progress. Through days of pain sometimes so severe I couldn’t think straight, the record and book were happening!

Sleep, eat, parent, work, parent, record, rehearse, repeat. So it went for the next year. The sonic elements of the record were the easy part. I’ve made many records and written many songs. Writing and designing the book were new, as was working with the plugins. These were steep learning curves, happening while I was in full creative singer/songwriter/arranger/producer mode. I loved building the colours around the acoustic spines of the tracks. I worked extensively with strings and choral vocal arrangements, as well as digging in and creating unique sounds out of whatever was available to me, digitally and otherwise. The parts came fluidly. If an idea wasn’t cooking, it was scrapped. I didn’t wrestle with stuff not working. Usually, the parts sang themselves in my head. It was a matter of extracting them and finding the right sound, the one that fit with the track.

Also new to me was mixing a full length record. I’d released a few singles during the pandemic years and beyond. Mixing a full record is a different beast. Another learning curve. I mixed as I went. There was little to do when the tracking was done. I tweaked a few of the acoustic guitars and made some small changes. It was then time to master.

With Howard on board to master the record, we set to work finding the right chain of gear to put the final stitches into the Frankenstein. It was a looooooooooooooooooooong process. I’d always left mastering to others. I was fully involved this time. It meant going back to the songs and massaging the vocals deeper into the sonic landscape of the arrangements. I also had to tweak some of the levels on the instruments to sit better in the tracks. We wrapped the mastering and the end result is a beautiful sounding record. When I was able to take myself out of the recording and listen as just listener and not creator, I was touched. It felt like the singer was in the room with me. The sonic wormhole surrounding the vocals were what I had first envisioned. That coming to pass was a feather in my cap. While mastering, I was working concurrently on finishing the book and getting it printed.

The design of the book was going amazingly. I added a dedication, table of contents, afterword, all the things to make it feel like a proper book. The printing then became an epic situation, due to a ghost in the machine. The first run of books did not look like the proof I signed off on. Something happened in cyberspace that made one of the images look wacky. This required another few weeks of back and forth with printer and Alexis, figuring out what the issue was. It was mad. Finally, out of the murky mist, the final proof was good and off to print we went. I received the first run of books in the middle of February of 2025, which is the same month I’m writing this. With the book and record done, here I am, getting it set up for all of you to read and hear.

The creation of the book was important to me. As I mention in the afterword, I wanted you to have something to hold. Something tactile and real, to compliment and help heal the disconnect of all our modern digital trappings. As a kid I used to love pouring over an album’s liner notes, reading all the details about what went into making it; the names of the band members, the lyrics, the artwork, where it was recorded, and the little tidbits of random info that made you feel like you were on the inside of something.

So, here we are. A new record that I never thought I’d make. My first book, the first of many, I hope. Against the odds, with the help and support of dear family and friends, these creations happened. In hindsight I’m aware of the Herculean effort that went into completing this phase of my artistic life. There were days I wanted to die, not because of any garden variety artistic crisis, but because living with intense chronic pain, along with prolonged use of pharmaceutical painkillers, have a way of taking their toll on a body and being. It’s hard to stay ahead of the black dogs of depression when sitting still hurts. Still, we persist. I made it. It was no small feat. The record and book are beautiful. I hope the songs on the record hit you. Here’s to creativity and connection.

K. xo

The Warmth of an Open Door

by kelvin wetherell on January 1, 2025January 1, 2025

Taken New Year’s Eve on Busy Street, just before meeting the man in the shiny jacket.

We chased our pleasures here
Dug our treasures there
But can you still recall
The time we cried
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side

– Jim Morrison, Break On Through

He approached me through the drizzling rain, his jacket a twinkling shine large silver, green and red sequins. I think he was wearing antlers, or maybe they were alien antennae. It was dark. I was high on painkillers and THC oil and probably shouldn’t have been out in public, for I was not feeling at all fit for human consumption. He, in a gentle voice, said to me “Hi, good evening. We’re hosting a free event tonight. We have musicians set up and they’ll start to play in a few minutes. You’re welcome to join us.”

I looked through the open door into the event. Cartoons were playing on a large screen on one wall. The lighting was low and attractive. I felt a pull to go in. “Will you be here for the countdown?” I asked.

“Yes, we’ll be here until 1am.” he said.

I thanked him and kept on. This was on Busy Street, a short, charming stretch of road that runs behind the Value Village in Leslieville. It reminds me more of something out the the Bowery in 1970s New York City than something you’d see in modern day Toronto. While I walked home, I opened a discussion in my head, lobbing the pros and cons of going or not going. I felt like it was somewhere I should be, to ring in the fucking new year and all that.

“The fucking new year?” I can hear you saying to yourself. Where’s he going with this? Is this going to be a pile of major bitterness?” Well, yes, and no.

In the past, I’ve been the first one to hit the socials and ring in the annual turnover with all the righteous platitudes. This year was different, for two main reasons: the first is that I’m more and more sick of social media all the time. The clickbait, the phony, staged bullshit and, most of all, the desperation. We artists posting like crazy, our creations there for a nanosecond, then evaporated into the mists of digital nevermore. I get why we need to do this and admire those of us with the wherewithal to continue to do it without choking on the puke in our mouths.There are so many breathtaking bits of artistic heroism out there, but it’s so disappointingly momentary. And the sheer volume of it. I’m not good with too much of anything. I’d prefer less and social media is the not the landscape where less is the order of the day. It might help us all if I decided to shit or get off the pot. To go all in with it, especially with a new record to promote, or to delete all my accounts and go dark. The second reason is the deep depression that I’ve found myself in, and fighting against. It’s been here very intensely for the last year, ramping up towards year’s end, as my chronic pain issues have increased and become more debilitating. I’ve become, this season, acutely aware that the pain from my hip surgery and trashed nervous system may be things that I may have to live with for the rest of my life. Aware that management, rather than a curative solution, may be the new reality. It would require an acceptance and a process of grieving that I’ve been struggling with accepting for weeks. I’ve tried everything, and spent thousands in different therapies, working on a solution, all to no avail.

That said, I can’t help but wonder if my pain would lessen if I were spending my days doing what I love doing, instead of spending hours a day working at something that I’m not naturally inclined to excel at.

Yesterday I found myself cringing at the litany of posts on facebook and IG, with all the things everyone accomplished in 2024. Again, I’d usually be the first to champion my deeds. I don’t want to disparage anyone who worked their magic to make shit happen. This stuff is hard. I felt the way I did due to the stark reflection of my own feelings of failure and not meeting the sky high mark of my perfectionist standards staring back at me. I feel like I barely survived the year. My biggest accomplishments were taking Ava, my daughter, to New York City for our summer holiday, and, against the odds, finishing Stereophile (the record and the book). The latter took two and half years to complete. There were days and weeks where I was too damaged to make any progress. There were times where I worked longer sessions, in the timeless flow of creativity, only to suffer the physical effects of that, having to then take weeks off to heal. I had best laid plans to gig like hell last year, only to wake one night in February, from my second show of the year (which was great), with my body screaming at me to stand down. I listened, and stopped all work on the live shows, knowing that I couldn’t finish the record and gig concurrently, along with being a present Dad and solo householder with a day gig.

I didn’t go back to that warm and welcome room last night. I got home and barred the door, wept buckets for my broken body and battered mind, for the state of the world, and for what feels like the most disconnected and isolated I’ve ever been from everything. The attraction to that open door and the warmth within was the connection I’m missing and yearning for. Playing live music does this for me. It’s my primary source of feeling connected. It’s not just playing the music. It’s meeting people. It’s the hangs with friends old and new. It’s the natural high after the gig, that carries over into the days after. At that gig in February, which was through So Far Sounds Toronto, and in the basement of a local chap’s house, there was a queue for the bathroom after the show. One high point of the night was chatting with a girl in line. She was from Brazil and a few years new to Toronto. We didn’t get into anything deep. We connected. Plain and simple. Or not plain. Divine is a better word for it. The web of our humanity grows vaster and stronger with each of these interactions. We come away from them more beautiful for the experience.

I passed out last night listening to a live take of Roadhouse Blues. I woke this morning and listened to Break On Through. That lead to finding a clip from the Classic Albums series, where the people involved in classic records talk about what went into creating them. Often, if the engineers and musicians are still alive, they’re the ones involved. In the case of Break On Through, the engineer felt like Morrison had a Sinatra vibe, in that his vocals went from a crooner-type delivery to a soaring, visceral growl. When he showed Jim the vocal mic he’d be using, the singer was chuffed and said it was the same mic that Sinatra used. This is the stuff. I love it. Music nerdery at it’s best.

As I sit here at the local and write this, I’m feeling good. I’m writing and riffing on all the good feelings of creativity and connection. A dear friend sits beside me. People pass by, many bleary-eyed from last night’s revelry. We see other friends passing by. We meet new ones. It feels good to be here and feeling fine. Who knows what this year holds, what divine paths will cross and what wonders may come. Finishing the record and book are a massive victory. I hope to make a success of Stereophile. Mostly, I hope to connect with others via live music and real time social connection. Here’s to having the physical ability to do so. Here’s to the undeniable worth of us connecting through music. Here’s to seeing you out there sometime soon.

As always, thanks for reading. And Happy Fucking New Year 😉

K. xo

Muppetite For Destruction

by kelvin wetherell on September 28, 2024September 29, 2024

“Yesterday we obeyed kings and bent our necks before emperors. But today we kneel only to truth, follow only beauty, and obey only love.”

“Are you a politician asking what your country can do for you or a zealous one asking what you can do for your country? If you are the first, then you are a parasite; if the second, then you are an oasis in the desert.”

– Khalil Gibran

I’m sitting in the window at the local, in my usual spot. It was an adventure to get here. I live a block away. I’ve been staying at an Air BnB, courtesy of my own voice and advocacy with our local Metrolinx community rep, referred to herein, for the sake of anonymity, as “M”.

After five sleepless nights over a seven day period, due to overnight Ontario Line work on the Queen Street bridge, my continual, kind and firm communications with M resulted in Metrolinx footing the bill for the Air BnB stay. I’ve been dividing my time between sleeps there and working from home during the day. What a pain in the ass. It’s proven to be a trade off of which flow is more tiring. I’ve let our rep know that I’m grateful for her going to bat for Ava and I, but that there’s much left to be done to ensure peace for all of us living here and elsewhere, affected by the ongoing work, especially after learning that the project’s end date has been extended from 2027 to 2031 (Eglinton Crosstown, anyone?).

A friend of mine recently appeared in a Toronto Life piece, entitled Train Wreck. She’s a local dog-mum and lovely person. She, along with a few others, tell their stories. These all involve how the company has repeatedly shat on us. Lies, deceit, deflection, all underscored by greed and ego. So-called Captains Of Industry sneaking and bullying their way to impotent grandeur. A CEO in our current premiere’s (lower case intended) pocket. A CEO to whom the same premiere has given a $750,000 raise between 2017 and 2022. That’s our tax dollars at work. Padding the bank account of a wretch, who’s led a campaign of dirty pool and cut corners.

Inevitably, this is where one usually gets called out, claiming the necessity of better transit and NIMBY (Not In My Backyard) leanings. I’m all for better transit. That’s not what this is about. It’s about transparency and spending the right amount of money on ensuring the peace of mind and wellbeing of the locals in the communities in which this project is happening. Metrolinx has not done this. The Train Wreck article outlines all of this: damage done to people’s properties, foundations, possessions, the sleepless nights, the constant runaround from the company, the lack of transparency.

To me personally, it’s about much more than the above. I look at the bridge, only a few feet from our front door, and it’s a representation of what’s so wrong in our current climate. We were long ago drugged by TV. Add social media, dopamine and smartphone addictions to that list. We are idle and distracted while this elected official robs us blind, giving our money away to cronyism and for his own personal gain. It’s Corruption 101. There’s the attitude that we live in a democracy. That this provincial leader was appointed by the vote. The only problem with this is that there are a lot of gullible people out there. There are two types of people who voted for this person: Those too stunned to understand the damage he’s doing, and those who know exactly what he’s doing and stand to gain financially from it.

I understand very clearly now why Che Guevara took up arms against dictatorship and stood up for socialism. If you’re gobsmacked by me comparing the attempted violent overthrow of past dictators to our relatively docile Canadian landscape, I’ll say this: I’m very grateful to live in Canada and enjoy the benefits of safety and help from the Guv’nor in the form of things like the Canadian Childcare benefit. As a single Dad and Musician, this alone has helped me make ends meet. I’ll add that, while the premiere and CEO made mention here have not sent out men in black to murder their naysayers, their modus operandi is more insipid. These are people who will gladhand us and smile sweetly in our faces, while dipping an unseen hand into the national coffer. These actions and lack of care paint an ugly picture of suffering. I see Southern Ontario floods if the greenbelt is sold off to questionable developers. Yes, we need more housing, in particular, more affordable housing. Do we need it on the greenbelt. No. Any developer considering building here is part of the problem and is only looking out for themselves. I see the billions of taxpayer’s bucks being lost to the private sale of alcohol. Funds that could be spent on healthcare and education, instead of the decimation of these. I see the suffering of people in hospital emergency wards across the province, sitting on floors for lack of space, at the hands of a politician working hard to privatize health care, no doubt in alliance with those willing to practice private care and rake in the dough. For anyone with a lick of sense and curiosity, all of this is so obvious.

I was happy to come across both of the Khalil Gibran quotes above. The former means more to me than the latter. There were many times over the course of writing this where I felt sick in my heart. I needed to express all of this, but it’s energy I’d rather be spending on connecting us, rather than expounding on the ills of our society. Ills which, if we all had the capacity to care for each other first, and temper our lust for money, would not exist. It gets harder and harder to maintain a peaceful reconciliation of this stuff, especially as we’re seeing the cost of living skyrocketing, while the wealth divide increases and the middle class becomes obsolete. While I continue to advocate for my family and community, I’ll look for the the strength to kneel only to truth, follow only beauty, and obey only love. To cultivate my Muppetite For Destruction. It’s a tall order in the face of modern life and all our challenges from without and within. May we all find the strength to continue to tear down all of that which doesn’t serve us, and to continue to love one another.

K. xo

NYC

by kelvin wetherell on August 19, 2024August 19, 2024

“I want to wake up in the city that never sleeps…”

– Sinatra

“Now you’re in New York/These streets will make you feel brand new/Big lights will inspire you”

– Alicia Keys/Jay Z, Empire State Of Mind

“When you first took my hand on that cold Christmas Eve/You promised me Broadway was waiting for me”

– Shane MacGowan/Kirsty MacColl, Fairytale Of New York

“When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.”

– Fran Lebowitz, Metropolitan Life (1978)

“I’m walkin’ here!!”

– Al Pacino, Midnight Cowboy

It’s been a minute. I’ve been missing the regularity of writing for you (and for me!) while the irregularities of the summer schedule play out. One of those irregularities was a very much welcome one; Ava and I recently took a four day whirlwind trip to New York City. It was Ava’s first time on a plane and, for both of us, our first time in New York. We got back a week ago and I’m still processing. I think I will be for a long time.

Anyone who’s been to New York might well attest to its immediate effect. We took an Uber from Newark Liberty Airport in New Jersey, across the bridge into New York. Total gridlock at 1pm. The traffic and our hunger after travelling couldn’t quell the excitement. We landed at our AirBnb in Harlem and dropped off our bags. Our host had left us snacks, which we made short work of, so we could get outside and start exploring. We were three blocks east of Central Park. Our first afternoon and evening was spent exploring the immediate area and finding a bodega to buy breakfast supplies at. So to sleep…

I’m writing this morning, not to give you a total play by play of the trip. I think that would be a ponderous exercise. I’m writing because I need to get the experience out of my head and onto the page. Since getting home, I’ve been met with intense flashbacks of our experiences, to say nothing of the level of havoc the amount of walking we did wreaked on my chronic pain issues. I could’ve posted a bunch more quotes to lead off today’s writing. The ones above all directly apply. I always assumed that Frank Sinatra and writer Paul Anka were talking about living the high, showbiz life when they talked about the city that never sleeps. I’ve always pictured Broadway and the eyesore that is Times Square when hearing this line. It was also true in our little neighbourhood; there was noise all night long: trucks, people, voices…constant vibration.

I’ve not travelled much. When I have, it’s never been in the tourist spirit. I prefer to take enough time to feel what life there is like. Well, what life is like from the perspective of someone curious beyond tourism, but nonetheless on vacation. I won’t pretend to know what living anywhere is like without experiencing all the usual suspects of adulting. I’m a helpless romantic, but even my romance has limitations. Life is hard. The cost of living is real. I will say that my attraction and connection to New York City were immediate.

On the morning of our second day, Ava and I took the tube south to the Brooklyn Bridge stop. Leaving the station, we were met with the bridge itself, on a misty, rainy summer morning, disappearing in a vanishing point across the Hudson River. My breath caught. Shivers. It only got deeper and sweeter from there. We wandered everywhere. One World Trade still has a gravity to it. There we stood, in a place where, all those years ago, the stupidity of mankind resulted in a staggering loss of life. I recently read a quote that said something about not finding anything typical of America in New York. This was true for me. I’ve longed held the way by which America is run, and attitudes typical of that ignorance and self-proclaimed superiority, in deep contempt. The line between the people and it’s financial/political/military rule must be drawn. Everyone we met in New York was amazing (except the security guards at the Chrysler Building, who had too much time on their hands and not enough to vent their testosterone on).

All the tube station names are done in this beautiful mosaic tile.

Since our return, some folks have asked what the highlight was. It’s almost impossible to pick one, but if I had to, it would be the revelation we received in the graveyard of The Basilica of St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral. The Basilica is an old church with catacombs beneath. Ava and I went in to ask what the tour was all about. Their 11:45 tour group didn’t show. We ended up having a private, guided tour of the church by a chap called Lee, who’d grown up in the area. He has a vast knowledge of local history. Martin Scorsese grew up in the neighbourhood, went to school across the road and was an altar boy at the church. The real life events from his film, The Gangs Of New York, took place where we were standing. The wall surrounding the church was put up explicitly to keep the church form being damaged by the warring religious factions. Ava and I are fond of graveyards and cemeteries, so this stop and our walk through St. Paul’s graveyard earlier in the day were high points, with their sacred sense of history and the Divine. We saw gravestones dating back to the 1700s. I still haven’t mentioned the highlight. While in the graveyard, Lee gestured to a building adjacent to it. It was an old brick buidling with a modern, grey addition added to the roof. Lee pointed out the terrace visible from where we stood. It was David Bowie’s condo from the time he bought it in 1999, up until the time of his death in 2016. Ava and I got all wide-eyed when he told us this. I have more shivers in the retelling. I pictured Davey coming out on to the terrace of a morning, coffee in hand and looking out across the big city. I saw him leaving the building to head to the studio to cut Blackstar, his last record and brilliant epitaph. I saw him in his final days, after the well-recorded courage with which he navigated his disease. This last image is the hardest, for obvious reasons. Oof.

The wall at the Old Basilica, where the Gangs of New York held court.

The other highlight for me happened unexpectedly, on our way to the subway to begin our journey back to Toronto. We started the day at a cafe near the AirBnb, I didn’t get the name of it. Coffee and pain au chocolat were excellent, as was our host. The scary part was paying for our stuff and needing the bathroom, only to find it occupied by some dude who was taking his time, if you know what I mean. After a few days of restaurant food my bowels were, aherm, compromised. I began to sweat, literally, but willpower trumped biological need, as I felt strongly that shitting my pants on our last day in New York City would be poor form. To be clear, not shitting my pants was not the highlight. Read on…

I was about to fork over about $175 CAD for the Uber back to Newark. There was a chap on the back patio of the cafe, with his babe sleeping in the stroller beside him. He was clearly a regular, as the owner came out to chat with him. I told them we were on our way back to T.O. and asked if they knew about flat rates with the NYC Yellow Cab Co. They didn’t, but it turned out that the young Dad, called Ajay, grew up in Scarborough. He told us how to get to the New Jersey trains down at Penn Station, which went directly to Newark Liberty. This info saved us a ton of money. It meant more legwork, but, even though the crush to get on the Jersey trains at Penn Station is intense and overwhelming, it was worth it. Reason being is that we had to walk across the top of Central Park to get the right line going south. On the walk, which happened to coincide with a car free Saturday morning in the area, not dissimilar to Pedestrian Sundays in Toronto’s Kensington Market, we came across Malcolm X Boulevard. This was unexpected. Ava was curious as to why I wanted a pic, as she and I have never discussed Malcolm’s legacy. Malcolm is a hero of mine. I read his autobiography in my twenties and it was hugely inspirational. That someone could emerge from where he started, as a criminal in the streets of Chicago, to where he ended up, is something. After his trip to Mecca, in the face of being blacklisted by the Nation Of Islam and subsequently assassinated by members of the same, he returned to America with the realization that there was hope for black and white to coexist. Mecca was the only place where he’d experienced being treated with love and equality by human beings with blue eyes and blond hair. His was a life of evolution and great courage. I feel glad in my heart that this was my final experience of New York.

The view from Central Park, looking east.

When we landed at Billy Bishop in Toronto and got in the Uber to head home, the first thing I noticed is how clean our city is. I was chuffed to come across Fran Lebowitz’s quote. It’s really true. I’m happy that my city is not filthy, but clean is not enough. There’s something about every aspect of New York City that gives it its depth. It’s magnetic. The city is magnetic. My most excellent travelling companion and I plan to return as soon as we can. We saw so little while we were there. What little we did see left indelible marks on our hearts and spirits. I see us being there together again. I see me playing shows there. I see more of New York in our lives.

Thanks so much for reading. I realize this is a longer entry and it’s not linear. It’s representative of the way the images and feelings of the trip continue to hit me, at random, inducing a fluttering of the heart and a wistful feeling for a city so new to me, yet so familiar. New York City had always been something that was almost a fictional point of reference. Some place I saw on a map and in movies, music and culture. Now it’s in me. So many cultural dots were connected on this trip. My world is a little bit smaller for the experience. There’s so much more to say, but I’ll leave it here for now. Maybe the rest will appear in song at some point…

K. xo

Beware of Elf

by kelvin wetherell on May 13, 2024May 13, 2024

“La Niña de Los Peines had to tear apart her voice, because she knew experts were listening, who demanded not form but the marrow of form, pure music with a body lean enough to float on air. She had to rob herself of skill and safety: that is to say, banish her Muse, and be helpless, so her duende might come, and deign to struggle with her at close quarters. And how she sang! Her voice no longer at play, her voice a jet of blood, worthy of her pain and her sincerity, opened like a ten-fingered hand as in the feet, nailed there but storm-filled, of a Christ by Juan de Juni.”

– Federico Garcia Lorca, Obras Completas, Vol. 1

The passage above, from Lorca’s complete works, is preceded, in context, by the Spanish singer Pastora Pavon (La Nina) delivering a technique-perfect, but soulless round of songs to a crowd of the who’s who of the scenesters of the day. The audience sat quiet and still. No applause. Nothing. Nonina, as they say in Andalusia. Someone from the audience stands up from behind his brandy bottle and says ‘Here ability is not important, nor technique, nor skill. What matters here is something other.’

Pastora then digs deep, lets go, and lets loose.

I’ve only scratched the surface of Lorca’s vast beauty. What I do know of his work is wrapped in glorious romance, sadness and bravery. Everything I’ve experienced of his writing and life takes my breath away. It was he that introduced me to the concept of duende. The translation of the Spanish duende, to English, is elf. I love that, because elves, but it means so much more. Lorca refers to it this way:

“With idea, sound or gesture, the duende enjoys fighting the creator to the very rim of the well…the duende wounds. In the healing of that wound which never closes lies the invented strange qualities of an artist’s work.”

– Sidebar!: I’m sitting at my local, which I’m always sitting at when I write. A guy came in earlier, seeing a pic of Jimmy Carter on the wall while he was passing by. He came in and started talking to everyone in the cafe about Jimmy Carter pardoning all the American draft dodgers of the Vietnam war. He spoke to one of the folks sitting here who happened to be a U.S. war vet. They had an excellent conversation about the currently morbid state of America (See what I did there? Groaaaannn). He named all the Jimmies on the walls, except for the one hanging behind me. I told him it was Jimmy Page. He thanked us for our smiles and disappeared to go get his haircut by George, our local Greek barber, only to return a while later, hair intact because George is closed today. He told the ladies that work here that, because he came in with a Timmie’s cup earlier, he wanted to come back and do them a solid and buy a cup from them. Solid character, that. He and I talked for a good half hour about motorbikes (Triumph vs. Harley and the shaft drive on his ‘83 Honda Goldwing) and English history. This man, Toby by name, and an Englishman by way of Ireland, has a deep knowledge of the Brit’s legacy. Fascinating. Turns out he’s a local. I hope I see more of him. I also kinda hope he doesn’t get his hair cut. He’s got an epic topknot. I love this stuff; our connections. My morning here has been peppered with visits from locals that I call friends. I would say I digress, but I won’t, because this stuff is what makes our lives amazing. So, back to duende…

It’s on my radar, this ancient thing, while I tussle with a modern problem…social media. The first time I heard about Facebook, I thought “No good can come of this”. Now, all these years later, it feels like the damage social media has done to us outweighs the good it’s wrought. My hunch was accurate.

My social numbers have never been great. I’m in the process of yet another attempt to reattune myself to going fully into them, to promote Stereophile, my new record and accompanying small format book. I’m told that the reason for my low numbers is the irregularity with which I post. I get that. I also get, and I’ve said it before, that art should not be reduced to content. We’re all struggling so hard to produce, produce, produce. FOMO. Keep that shit going, or fall by the wayside while the true hustlers get Instafamous. Malarkey. What this constant need to produce has resulted in is a lot of disposable, disingenuous shite, borne of a desperation to go viral in a world where the arts, especially music, have been decimated. There is little duende in the social media landscape. A lack of grit, shadow or depth. I don’t think that’s news. Liam Gallagher said recently that everything is beige. Artists I know who have great followings see the socials as an albatross around their necks. A tiresome, necessary evil. They’re a drag on art.

A week ago I had my finger on the DELETE trigger of my IG and FB. My site analytics gave me pause. Lo! Traffic was up, due to me consistently composing and posting my writings. I’ve spent the week researching the best way to take a solid crack at the crazy game of online promo. To find the most effective, efficient way to get the goods out, that leaves more time to create and hang out with family and friends. A friend is helping get this together and we’re discussing her coming on board to help manage the promo regularly. This weekend I had a first rehearsal with a rhythm section of two fine chaps (more on them later). The team is growing, which is amazing for me and long overdue. I’ve felt isolated for a while now, having others to create with feels wonderful. Moreover, having pals to hang with is giving me all the good fuzzies.

The music is going great, that’s what matters most. At least it does to me. I don’t care much anymore for wearing all the hats that a modern singer/songwriter is expected to wear. I’m still not sure how the social monkey business will go. When a certain mood comes on, I find my fingers again hovering over the delete buttons. Whatever the case, I hope I can make my way into and through this vapid online wormhole with some sense of substance. To strike a fine balance between consistency and art. To do battle with the dark elf and pin the little fucker to the mat, and then sing about it, honouring the wound that heals but never closes.

I’ll keep you posted (See what I did there again? Groaaaannnn).

K. xo

ps. Here’s a link to the full piece that I pinched Lorca’s quotes from:

https://www.poetryintranslation.com/PITBR/Spanish/LorcaDuende.php

The Silent Accord

by kelvin wetherell on April 27, 2024April 28, 2024

The Silent Accord

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society”

– Jiddu Krishnamurti

Sitting here in the window at the local. It’s a rainy Saturday morning. The studio is whispering to me from a few blocks away. Urging me in. Urging me on. I’m in a weeks long cycle of pain, illness and procrastination. I am one guitar track and one vocal track away from finishing Stereophile, my new record. I am mustering the courage, the heart, to lay them down. To breathe it all out and elevate out of this hard place. I’m aware that, while I moan about the delays, I’m afraid to finish. Afraid to release this work into the world, these bits of soul made digital, and see it mostly ignored, if my previous work is any measure. I’m at once hopeful, while feeling the cold whisper of the voice of ridicule and shame trickling down the back of my neck.

I drink my coffee and watch the people go by. I think of a better world. One where we are not so pressed and dented. Where art is not reduced to content. Where the substance of our silent accord is lived, rather than its loss bemoaned as a symptom of modern life. A place free of our Post Pandemic Disconnection, the cortisol coming in waves as we panic for breath, for a short reprieve.

I think I may be in the wrong lane. It may be time to hang up my modest public presence in the world and beat a retreat. I’m sick of the spiritual shithole we’ve made of this place, with all its potential for greatness and kindness. I’m tired of the helpless, hateful rage I feel towards our politicians, and the corporate world, who continue to refuse accountability for the widespread damage born of their relentless pursuit to hoard and boast. These for whom money has replaced the hardwired neanderthal idiot male need to compete and dominate. The depth of this greed is an uncommon stupidity in this day and age. For those of you feeling like this is a finger wag, make no mistake, I see myself in these people. I see all of us in each other and everything else. We all have the potential to shine or shit the bed.

Coffee is almost done. Time to head over to the studio and get embryonic, while my heart longs for more real time connection, to be among a group of souls. Maybe that’s what’s missing. Maybe, instead of retreat, I need to get out more. For me, and everyone I know, having the energy and making time for something as simple as seeing a friend has, due to the relentless hustle to make ends meet, become elusive.

We are fragmented. The societal machine we continue to allow to run is sickly and wrong. The silent accord I mentioned earlier is the feeling we all get, in the quiet moments, where Love comes in and fills us with its amber glow. That light is in all of us. It is the eternal, fixed point, like lights along the landing strip at night’s most impenetrable hour.

I’ve been sitting here for a while now, thinking about a succinct way to wrap this one up, but I can’t find one. This is an ongoing trip. One without end. We are Divine Misfits made flesh and bone, each with our own story, each flawed and returning, missing home and looking for the runway lights…

K. xo